Blofeld Cat Rates That Lap a 12.7Cats, take the following quiz to rate your favorite laps.

You can share your score as a comment to this post, so we can all compare.

Rate that lap!

1. SQUISHINESS. When you sit on the lap in question, how squishy is it?

A. It’s like a marshmallow
B. Mostly squishy, but some firm places
C. Rock hard abs and thighs

2. TEMPERATURE. How warm is the lap?

A. Above 98.6 degrees (37 C)
B. Variable – some warm areas, some cooler
C. Polar bears would find this lap chilly

3. WIGGLE FACTOR. How squirmy is this lap?

A. No perceptible movement in a given 2 hour period
B. Some rearranging, but always gentle
C. Richter scale 7.2 or higher

4. SERVICE. When on this lap, how are you treated?

A. Premium snacks, on-site concierge, spa treatments
B. Snuggles and hugs
C. Books and remotes have fallen on me

5. CONSISTENCY. How often does this lap go out of order, to accommodate human breaks?

A. Once per day, at most
B. A couple of quick stretches and kitchen trips per nap session
C. Every 10 minutes

Add up your scores. Give your lap three points for every “A” response, two points for every “B” response, and subtract 2 points for every “C” response.

You may award extra points for catnip covered laps, dog free lap zones, and any lap that makes you a happy cat. Rate that lap!

How does your lap score?



About the Author

Cat Food Breath
Cat Food Breath
It's all about me. I am a 17 pound cat with a sushi habit. I’m fabulous …. what more does anyone need to know? As a Siamese, I am talkative, intelligent, extroverted, brave, funny, clever, and good at math. I'm an expert food critic, yoga instructor, relaxation consultant, and fur re-locator, but my full time avocation involves trying to get rid of the dog. I am polydactyl, hence the exceptional keyboard skills, and very literate, having napped on many comfortable books, magazines, and newspapers. I sleep a lot. If you are reading this, you have excellent taste in cats. Read even more at catfoodbreath.com.
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