Entrepreneurship, with Cat Food Breath

You might think that cats spend a lot of time just lying around, napping.. being generally lazy.

This is not true.

Most cats, myself included, are very creative. I use a lot of my energy thinking up great business ideas.

I’m a very entrepreneurial cat.

The problem is, that while I have a lot of ideas, I just don’t have access to capital. I’ve applied for business loans, and I keep getting rejected. I don’t have much in the way of documented employment history, I’ve never filed a tax return, and, legally, I’m not old enough to enter in to a contract. My humans aren’t interested in co-signing.

So, I have a lot of great ideas that are going to waste for lack of funding. I’ve considered using Kickstarter, but I thought I would start here and see if I could find a few partners for my ventures.

Keep in mind that all of these ideas are CAT APPROVED.

• CHEESE BUGS.

Think about it. A big bag of squishy bugs, each coated in delicious cheese. Or crunchy bugs, whichever you prefer. Who wouldn’t go through an entire bag of these in one sitting? Cheddar Crickets. Beetles in Brie. Swiss on a Spider. Yum, yum. I can’t believe they aren’t on the market now. If you don’t jump on this idea, I’m headed right over to Frito-Lay. This is going to be big.

• CATNIP TRUCK.

You all see how kids flock to the ice cream truck when it drives down their street? We need a mobile catnip dispensary. Can’t you picture the cart pulling up in front of your house, announced by the sounds of purrs and meows, and the driver calling “Catnip. Get your catnip here!”? You simply step to the curb, choose a bag or bale or other catnip confection, and the catnip cart moves on. Unlike ice cream, this truck will be popular year-round. This is a sure winner.

• EMPTYBOXES.COM.

Picture the Container Store merging with Amazon. All this site sells is empty cardboard boxes. Your cat can go online, choose the sizes and shapes that best suit his napping and game needs, and the next thing you know, the UPS driver is delivering a pile of cardboard fun. Cats will want to order new ones on a regular basis, since everyone knows that new boxes are the best. Foolproof.

If you’re interested in a business partnership, let me know, I am an expert product tester, and I can cover all the paperwork. I have years of experience in knowing what cats like. Any of these ideas can make you rich, and I have hundreds of ideas. I’ll be in my office waiting for your call.