Monocle Cat, despite looking rich, is still the 99 PercentI am a cat with no funds to pay for my (strictly medicinal) catnip needs.

I am the 99 percent.  Occupy the Couch.

MONDAY, A.M.  There are rumors that I may be evacuated from the couch… something about cleaning.  It’s not clear when I will be allowed back.

MONDAY, P.M.  The humans say that I have been served official notice and must vacate the couch.  They seem cranky, muttering phrases like “company arriving” and “dozen rolls of masking tape.”

I am a cat with no thumbs.

I am the 99 percent.  Occupy the Guest Bed. 

TUESDAY, A.M.  I was formally evacuated from the couch a few minutes ago, but I’ve managed to set up a new camp on the guest bed.   Humans are claiming that the couch evacuation is a “public health move,” and are bringing in the vacuum cleaner.

TUESDAY, P.M.  Plan to sleep all day on the guest bed … the radical adjustment in the protest has been exhausting.

I am a cat that has very restricted access to the fish in the fish bowl.

I am the 99 percent.  Occupy the Guest Bed. 

WEDNESDAY, A.M. I am now officially protesting my lack of access to the couch from the guest bed.  Occupation of the guest bed is a lot like occupation of the couch, but with more pillows.

WEDNESDAY, P.M.  Humans concede that my cat rights would be violated if I wasn’t allowed back on the couch.

I am a cat forced to work at part time jobs like adding fur to the laundry.

I am the 99 percent.  Occupy the Couch. 

THURSDAY, A.M.   A “day of action” is in order to commemorate two months of couch occupation.  Do you think a yawn, stretch, and a full-body rearranging between naps is enough action?

THURSDAY, P.M.  Occupation rally cry:  “All day, all week, feed the kitty more treats.”

I am a cat that does not have 24/7 access to a concierge and room service.

I am the 99 percent.  Occupy the Couch.

FRIDAY, A.M.   I am starting to wonder if blaming the 1% is necessary, as long as you can blame the dog.

FRIDAY, P.M.  Operation Occupy the Couch will continue.  Don’t forget to apply for your official Occupy the Couch Potato status.

Stay tuned for updates.



About the Author

Cat Food Breath
Cat Food Breath
It's all about me. I am a 17 pound cat with a sushi habit. I’m fabulous …. what more does anyone need to know? As a Siamese, I am talkative, intelligent, extroverted, brave, funny, clever, and good at math. I'm an expert food critic, yoga instructor, relaxation consultant, and fur re-locator, but my full time avocation involves trying to get rid of the dog. I am polydactyl, hence the exceptional keyboard skills, and very literate, having napped on many comfortable books, magazines, and newspapers. I sleep a lot. If you are reading this, you have excellent taste in cats. Read even more at catfoodbreath.com.